Disgust

Today, I looked in the mirror while getting changed. That was the worst thing to happen to me all day. 

I was riddled with disgust, despair and even disbelief. How could I have put on all of this weight, when I decided that moving away from home would result in me losing weight? I stuffed myself before leaving due to me getting super excited that I would loose it again. but this is just sheer lies. 

I have had a wonderful day, ate, worked, napped, showered, watched TV with the boyf. But all of a sudden this didn’t seem to matter anymore – because of this mound coming out of my stomach. 
For a couple of seconds I tried to convince myself I was pregnant – just for an explanation. 

PREGNANT?! REALLY?! 

But as I shook to the ground in despair. I decided that is where I will lie from now on before I go to bed. Lie and do sit ups and crunches until I get my body back to where it needs to be. Because I have a fair few events this month, and I don’t want to be cursing the camera after all of them. 

Tomorrow, I will go to the gym. 

 

(famous last lies from everyone – mainly because tomorrow never technically comes)

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